Growing towards the Light

Well it won't be long now and Fall will come to a close and winter will be upon us. At least that's the way it's suppose to go...but this weather has been crazy! We had a lot of fun the other day, when the above picture was taken. The boys had leaves all in their clothes :)

I'm starting a new study with the boys. I'm not sure what to call it...it will be on apples, seeds, vines, fruit of the spirit... I guess you could say it's on spiritual growth. This will mainly be for Bear, to encourage his Christian walk. But, I'm sure Monkey will have lots of fun with all of the things we do also. Maybe I'll call it Growing Towards the Light. In fact, I plan on starting another blog strictly for this...more later.

Today we started out the study by reading two books: The Apple Pie Tree and We Plant a Seed. We pretty much just talked about the stories and how we can compare ourselves to plants. Plants need light, soil, and water in order to grow, just as we need certain things in order to grow in our relationship with Christ. Bear mentioned the Bible, church, and nice friends that help us 'be a better Christian' We talked about how plants grow towards the light, just as we should be growing towards the Light...Jesus Christ. Just reading and talking with Bear was so easy to do, so enjoyable, and so meaningful to both of us. Monkey loved the stories, but did end up falling asleep in my lap :)

Hopefully I'll have the new blog up and going soon! Happy Fall!

Living Victoriously

To here our story visit my first entry... http://toddlittlelamb.blogspot.com/2008/07/nacham.html

Life is changing right before my very eyes. Fall, the season of leaves changing colors, and cooler weather. Plus, Bear will be 7 tomorrow and Monkey will be 4 in December...

October is a special month for me. A month of memories. A month of healing. A month of growing. It's been 8 years since we lost Todd. It's a weird feeling being able to talk to Bear about his brother in Heaven. We talked the other day about how it was sad for us saying goodbye to him. It was amazing to be able to talk to Bear about how even though it was hard and so sad, God gave us hope and healed our hearts. But, He didn't stop there. He gave us happiness and blessed us with a son, one year and four days later, and then another, and then another. Three sons to raise!

We aren't the only ones who have gone through pain and struggles. The world is filled with people hurting...and God wants to minister to each of us. We can live our lives victoriously, not just barely making it through, but living a life full of joy and love and hope!

Life is changing...God will never change...

A conversation to share: This took place while waiting for slushes at Sonic...
'Hey lady, you mind turning your music down?' 'Oh, sure sorry to bother you.' (I proceeded to pretend to turn it down) 'I don't like that Bible thumping music' 'What bothers you about it?' (the whole time I'm trying not to upchuck in his face, very nervous) 'I'm a good person and work hard, I don't need God' 'Well, I don't know what I would do without God' (thinking in my mind what do I say to this guy, I sound so stupid) 'Ya, well He's never done anything for me.' 'But, He has, He died for everyone so that we can live through Him' (slushes came...his order too...Bible songs playing in the background, louder than before)
I have never had a conversation like this before. The man left before anything else was said. But I got the chance to share a little, with the boys in the back seat, and all because of a cd! So, turn up the music!

This is the cd we were listening to: http://www.worshipmusic.com/spd1245.html

Excalibur Academy

Let me just get the negative out of the way, so the rest can be nothing but positive. The joys of homeschooling have been few and far between this week! Bear is growing up so fast and he seems to be going through some changes. From losing his first tooth to gaining more attitude...things have been interesting around here.

The thing is I never thought I would home school. I just couldn't picture it, I had other plans, so did my husband. But, one thing I'm staring to learn (even though you'd think I would have learned it by now)God had other plans. It just seemed like the more we prayed about it the more confident we were that homeschooling the boys was the right thing to do. I say that we will just take it one year at a time...

I've been learning a lot lately about plans. Lesson plans, plans for the day, plans for our future, and my ability (or lack) to make them. It seems like every time I make a plan to do something or try to schedule our day it falls through! It's frustrating for someone who tends to be a little bit of a control freak. Anyway, I'm a slow learner, but I'm learning to ask God for help, to actually invite Him to make the plans for me. This may sound a little odd, but it works. It's not like He actually says, 'O.k. Amy you need to give Bear a lesson on fractions and then do handwriting.' Although that would be EXTREMELY convenient! But, He does speak to me in other ways. I feel a peace about my day. I'm able to let go of things that are not important and focus on my students. My sons. The thing that is not important is house cleaning, of course.

Excalibur Academy is the name of our school. We (meaning my sister,Karen) picked the name because it has a medieval sound to it and we (meaning my knight in shining armor and me)always say we are raising little knights. I want my boys to grow up to be men of chivalry. The ones that will open doors for women, the ones that will honor women, the ones that will always look to their King. Needless to say our little squires keep us busy!

So, I'll just end in saying that I'm not sure what the future holds exactly (even though that is a little annoying) but, I do know that God does and maybe it's best that I don't know everything...maybe. Until that time comes I will just have to trust God with the details.

Monkey loves to use his clothes pin counting cards.


We started a study on China. Here's Bear using chopsticks.


Puppy love stopping to smell the flowers.

Tea Time

We had a good day today! This trip has been a stressful one, which I expected, but today was a good reprieve. We went to the Hard Rock Cafe in Phoenix, which was some pretty good food!! It was really cool it had this Harley set up, and of course lots of guitars. Than after that we had tea with my Aunt Janet, whose from England, and Uncle Ken. This was a very special thing to do, I will always remember our tea times with my family. Plus, I think it was the first time that I was able to open up to someone in the family about Nana and Papa. Uncle Ken and Aunt Janet are really easy to talk to and agreed about a lot I had to say.

Tomorrow is not exactly planned out, but I'm hoping that it will be a repeat of today.Here are some pics of the day:

Kodak moments and vise versa

Well, the first picture is of what Karen and I got to see our first night in Arizona. It was beautiful! The second picture is of Karen...they had these really cool giant chess pieces there...we didn't actually play, just a Kodak moment. We had so much fun, this time was very special for us.

I've learned a lot about myself this week. Too many to mention really, but the main thing is that no matter how much I learn or grow, I will never need God any less. This may sound cheesy, but this week has been the most emotional and physically straining time in a long time! I can't even explain it really...it's been hard being away from the boys and John...it's been hard being away from my church...it's been hard being away from my friends, it's been hard seeing Papa the way he is.

The good things is that John got a texting plan before we came...that John is always willing to listen...my boys are with the best in-laws ever, my friends are always there for me...and my sister is going through this with me! The best though is that God has given me exactly what I've needed exactly at the right time I needed it!

Well, this has been kind-of all over the place, but that kind-of fits the week so far. I'm really relishing the special moments and I'm really glad I came, but will be even happier when I get home!

Let go...

Well, Saturday morning my mom, Karen, and I got on a plane and flew to Arizona. I'll just say now that I never realized that I was afraid to fly until then! I guess I was always distracted in the past. In other words, the boys were with me. I got myself so worked up I really thought I was going to have to use the barf bag. I was agitated that the flight attendant could tell me how to use the seat as a floatation device and how to use the oxygen mask and then tell me to sit back and relax! I was very nervous about leaving John and the boys, very nervous about seeing my Papa and Nana, just down right nervous.

I kept trying to tell myself I can do this...finally we got to the Las Vegas airport for an hour layover. I wasn't doing much better and I really didn't want to do this all over again.

Well, I stared listening to music when the plane took off again. The Barlow Girl song, "Let Go" came on...
"Let Go"

Yeah I trust in You
I remember times You led me
This time it's bigger now
And I'm afraid You'll let me down

But how can I be certain?
Will You prove Yourself again?

[Chorus:]
'Cause I'm about to let go
And live what I believe
I can't do a thing now
But trust that You'll catch me
When I let go
When I let go

What is this doubt in me
Convincing me to fear the unknown
When all along You've shown
Your plans are better than my own

And I know I won't make it
If I do this all alone

I'm not sure how to describe it, but things got better, but only when I stopped trying to do it myself. So far, this trip has been a combination of stress, shopping, sad times, good times, and swimming. The thing is even though I miss John and the boys, and it's hard to see my Papa so sick, I'm very grateful that I was able to make this trip. I have been having fun with my mom and sister. It's been very special. Good times :)
By the way, the picture above is of my sis, Karen, she's jumping on the bed :) We had a lot of fun at the Wigwam(hotel) at the Twlight Convention.

Amazing Grace

Last Sunday our preacher gave a sermon on Grace, using the verse below:
"For by GRACE you have been saved through FAITH; and that not of yourselves, it is a gift of God; not as result of WORKS, so that no one may boast. For we are His workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for GOOD WORKS, which God PREPARED BEFOREHAND so that we would WALK IN THEM." (Ephesians 2:8-10}

Before I stepped into the sanctuary, I talked to a friend and found out that she lost her grandbaby. Her son and wife miscarried. She was telling me that I was such a comfort to her, just seeing me with my boys now some how gave her comfort, hope. It got me thinking...Then I stepped into the sanctuary. They were singing Amazing Grace. Todd's song.

I have to admit it was a little hard to pay attention. But, just listening to him talk about how amazing His grace is, how Totally undeserved, yet freely given, amazing. It got me thinking again.

There aren't any words to describe what it was like to lose Todd. Yet, there aren't any words to truly explain what it was like to have God there with me. Todd's story isn't only about loss and pain, it's also a story of comfort and hope and even joy.

I was in pain, God gave me comfort. I was confused, God gave me peace. I was depressed, God gave me hope. I was bitter, God softened my heart.

I pray that God will use me to help people who are hurting. The below verse means so much to me, I consider it my life verse. God has given me comfort beyond understanding, I pray that He will use my life to help others, to comfort others.
2 Corinthians 1:3-8 (New American Standard Bible)
3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort,
4 who comforts us in all our affliction so that we will be able to comfort those who are in any affliction with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.